Best Couples Toys: How to Choose the Right One for You
The couples toy aisle has the same problem as the lube wall: loads of options, barely any explanation of what any of them are actually for. Wearables, app controlled eggs, rings, wands, dual stimulation vibrators it all blurs together, so people either buy the most talked about one or avoid the whole category out of confusion.
Here's the short version: the right couples toy depends on how you want to use it together. Worn during sex, used before it, controlled from across the room or across the country each of those points to a different type. Once you know which moment you're shopping for, the choice gets a lot easier.
This guide walks through the main types, what each one is actually good for, and how to land on the right one for you.
Wearable vibrators, worn during sex or out and about
These are small, internally worn vibrators controlled by a partner, either through an app or a physical remote. They're built to stay in place during penetrative sex or to be worn out and about, with control handed to your partner for a bit of anticipation.
Dual stimulation vibrators for penetrative sex
These sit differently to a wearable: they're C shaped or curved, worn by one partner during penetrative sex, and designed to stimulate both people at once rather than just one. Most are app or remote controlled too, so either partner can adjust the settings mid session.
Vibrating cock rings
A ring fitted at the base that adds vibration for both partners during sex, often the easiest and cheapest way into couples toys. Some are simple and non vibrating, others add motors and app control. Good starting point if you want something low commitment before spending more.
Shared foreplay: rabbit vibrators and massage wands
Not every couples toy is built for during sex. Rabbit style vibrators and massage wands are usually brought in beforehand, taking turns or using them together as part of foreplay rather than penetrative play.
Which one is actually right for you
If you're completely new to toys as a couple start simple. A non vibrating or basic vibrating ring is the lowest pressure entry point, cheap enough that it doesn't feel like a big decision, and easy to bring in without changing much about how you already have sex.
If you want to add sensation during penetrative sex without changing anything else a vibrating ring or a dual stimulation vibrator like the We Vibe Chorus Pro or Sync O is built exactly for this. Both are worn during sex rather than instead of it.
If distance or anticipation is part of the appeal look for app control specifically, not just a physical remote. Lovense and We Vibe both build toys that connect over the internet, so a partner can be in another room or another country and still be in control.
If you want something for foreplay rather than during sex itself a rabbit vibrator or massage wand gives you more to work with before moving on to anything else, and takes the pressure off needing a toy that does everything at once.
If discretion matters wearables worn internally are the quietest option in public settings, since nothing is visible. App controlled ones also tend to run quieter than remote controlled versions, which matters more than people expect.
A few things worth knowing before you buy
Use a body safe lubricant alongside any toy, particularly silicone toys, since silicone lubricant will degrade silicone material over time. A water based lube is the safest match for almost any toy material.
Clean toys properly after use, ideally with a dedicated toy cleaner rather than just water, especially for anything worn internally or shared between partners.
Talk about it before you buy, not just after. The toys that get used again and again are usually the ones both partners actually wanted, rather than one partner surprising the other. A quick conversation about what you're both curious about saves you buying something that ends up in a drawer.
Start on the lowest setting, particularly with anything new to both of you. Most toys have far more intensity available than you'll want on a first try, and it's much easier to increase than to back off once something feels like too much.
Common questions
Do we need the app, or does a remote work just as well?
A physical remote is fine for being in the same room, and tends to be simpler to set up. The app matters mainly for control from a distance, or if you want to save custom vibration patterns.
Are these toys only for penetrative sex?
No. Rings, rabbit vibrators, and wands are just as often used during foreplay, solo play, or as a starting point before anything else. Nothing here requires a specific type of sex to be worth owning.
Is it awkward to bring a toy into the bedroom for the first time?
It can feel that way before the conversation happens, but tends to matter far less once it's actually brought up. Framing it as something to try together, rather than something missing, usually takes the pressure off.
How loud are these toys really?
It varies a lot by model, but app controlled and internally worn options are generally the quietest. If discretion is a priority, that's the detail worth checking before you buy rather than after.
The bottom line
There isn't one best couples toy, the same way there isn't one best lubricant. A ring if you want something simple and affordable to start with, a dual stimulation vibrator if you want to add sensation during sex itself, a wearable if distance or anticipation is part of the appeal, and a wand or rabbit vibrator if foreplay is where you want to spend more time.
The right one is whichever matches how you and your partner actually want to use it, not whichever has the most features on the box. Ready to find yours? Browse our full couples range.
